Random thoughts of a restless mind.

Note: Read at your own risk. The probability of understanding the below write up is air thin. Thank you.

What does she want?  Is it nothing but patience or let’s give it a more fascinating name, call it hope. Is she ready if the Genie appears right in front of her  muttering, ‘your wish is my command’. Hope is just a word given for  accumulating the courage to do the right thing, this she knew. There is, she ponders, in every disposition, a certain defect, which not even the best education can learn to overcome. 

A lump in the throat that never ceases to die down. To carry the lump all the way through and season it with a dash of stretching those 14 facial muscles, yes, a smile. If smiling meant being happy, she would be the happiest soul.  She often smiled, for she was always surrounded by the love of  people. The reason she didn’t know, or probably, she didn’t want to know. For she feared of losing that very reason. She wasn’t  one among the sheep herd. 

She felt suffocated at the idea of doing what everybody did. She doesn’t want to settle for anything less than what she was searching for. She doesn’t have a destination. But all that matters to her is the journey. She often felt people considered her to be an automaton, a machine without feelings, snatching the last bit of a water droplet that could help her survive. She also knew she was wrong. Maybe she was snatched of that living water to be presented with a beaker of energy-rich drink. Just, maybe. And she knew, no matter  how fulfilling  the latter might be, her heart always longed for the former.

Temperament and guilt was not her thing. Presented with a reality, she would always chose the one that appeared to be, even though deep down, she knew it was the contrary.  She couldn’t live with the thought of not doing something and wondering all her life, about what could have happened if she had taken the big step, she preferred living with the consequences than a regret.

There is something  so bizarre about the predictions and in-harmony that a young mind comes up with in moments of considerable significance. For she always seems to have a stirring passion which unfortunately is against the general public opinion. Beyond the right and wrong, there is something meaningful. If only, she wished, people had the time to go to that place, to ponder, to help, to cherish, to live. For at a certain point in one’s life, she had started to notice the people around, how what she did affects them, how one little gesture could bring a smile on those worn out, happiness scraped lips.  Deep down, things hurt her. But she didn’t want to showcase that to the world.   

She perennially reached a saturation point.But she knows it is okay to break down. A periodic outflow of the water is necessary just as sweating is on a hot summer day. Stickiness, irritation and crankiness crept into the body and soul, but, it is important, for next comes the best part, you no more feel warm. Fresh she felt. It seems  like a glow on a late winter’s moon along the horizon.   A betterment. Even more so, a necessity. If all the things are with reference to some other, why is it wrong to do the things the way she wants to do ,she wonders.  She too has a reference.  Life had the best gleams of sunshine for her. But beyond that, there was an overwhelming pain she never wants to show.  She believed in shooting stars and spring rains and good luck, she laughed at her animosity. She is used to it.

 And now she awaits for the journey to begin.

 Having the least bit idea that the journey was long begun...

Transition from Daddy's girl to Mommy's girl.

No, not that transition. I'm done with chemistry for life.
This transition is of a first child, correction, spoiled-overly pampered-first child. That's right. It's me.

So, there comes a point in life when you are no longer are a little kid because you have gone around the Sun for nearly two decades and are an adult officially. Being a first child & the only girl child in your maternal family, you surely have a share of heavy pampering, love, affection and protective atmosphere. Everything is made easy for you and you are taken care of with utmost pleasure.

Then, you grow up. But still remain a little kid from within. You still enjoy having great length conversations with daddy best-est. It is generally said, Girls are always daddy's love and boys mommy's dearies. Yes. That's so true.

Then one fine day, you are wandering on the terrace with  your mother, admiring the clouds piled up that could pour down any second, and trust me, it is a treat to the eyes when you have been literally fried up by the terrifying summer. Savoring your cup of filter COFFEE. Yes, coffeeeeeeee. Always brings a smile, a huge one.

And then mother speaks. Beating around the bush, trying to sound just normal and still trying to make an effective impact. She slowly starts.
18.19..20..22.. these age groups you know. Transition phase you know. Wanting experience and change.
No you know this time. Meanwhile we figure out what the matter is all about. Okay, you can stop blushing now. Haha.
She continues, It happens you know.. Happens to everyone.. Normal stuff.. But..
There, you know what is going to come next.
 You feel the need to assure her that you are just fine and there is no problem. Apparently with context to love, relationships, etc. She doesn't want you to take her wrong.
She comes back, No..  not saying you will do something.. but it generally happens.. so, do not get distracted you know.. I know you won't.. But you know.. and a many more you know(s).

You calm her down. You assure her that you know your responsibilities and won't get distracted what so ever.  There isn't a need to get distracted when you have a family that loves you so much, that admires and respects every decision you take and allows you to explore with the right amount of freedom. Indeed, I am very lucky. I could never regret anything, because at some point of time, that was exactly what I wanted.

When you have a best friend in your parents, an overly protective family and wonderful friends, what more do you ask for? Of course, there are ups and downs, but what really matters is having people with you. I'm glad, I do.

You realize, you accumulate all your thoughts and analyze all that you have been offered with. Life is beautiful. Just explode and explore and most importantly be good. Somethings are best shared with mom and a few others with dad. Being a first child is so very overwhelming.
Beautiful dreams. Beautiful life. Everything is going to be just fine. Thank you. To everyone and everything that was, is and going to be. 

Voting, just another reason for a holiday? Of 21st century life & a mind-state of 7th century.

Disclaimer- This in an outburst upon hearing the views about voting. Not pointing towards all. But definitely towards those who are inconsiderate about the value of a vote and present the heights of selfishness.

Politics.
Voting. And.. you probably are going to skip this post right way claiming you hate politics, you aren't a political person or the usual loathe about politics.
Well, I don't know much about it for I am too young to talk about it. But one thing I am sure of, is that, Voting is one's right. We have a holiday for Independence Day, Republic Day, New Year, the national festivities and so does a Voting Day.
The reason implying the significance of Voting and not taking  a day off from the routine and arrange family outings or movie plans. Something more shocking  is when the youngsters have a  attitude that how is voting to a candidate, one  barely  even knows  going to change his/her life? Like, seriously? Change MY life? Is that all we are worried about? If that's an yes, the situation is pathetic.

Maybe it won't change your life altogether at once and that is ONLY because you have a comfortable decent life provided with all the basic amenities and a hike in prices isn't going to affect you much, because you have your parents right with you to take care of it all.
But trust me, it is going to make a HUGE difference to someone. Probably they could eat their daily meals, have good education or survive for one more day by your vote. All the events are interlinked. You vote a good person, a good government takes shape, good policies and opportunities for the citizens.
A miracle to the needy and poor.

All that a few people can do is capture a photo of the people residing in huts and slums and photo-shop it and tag it with a quote by a great person describing about the dreams in the eyes of the child belonging to a poor background and probably end up winning a photography contest. That is so very helpful. Just so appreciating. Life is more than this. Life is so much more than about YOURSELF.

I do not expect everyone to be selfless and give up everything they have. I am not going to do it as well. But a basic responsibility isn't painful to execute, right?  A Vote will make all the difference in the world.
People would stop bragging about the quality of education, cleanliness, environment and beauty of the foreign nations once the government is good in one's own country. The foreign countries posses development because they care. They care for the well being of all than about themselves.And the result? They live a more meaningful life with the most excellent quality of life, with reference to the education &  job opportunities. The huge stacks of money paid to the institutions for getting every little thing done would stop. Everything would be just and fine. Like those portrayed in movies. 

A grand parent passes away at a ripe old age due to natural death and we seem depressed for a month or so and are disturbed. Meanwhile, a farmer commits suicide in some part of the country and it is just a piece of news that we would probably replace with a favourite reality show broadcasted on the Television which in real, doesn't even have a speck of reality in it. This is our scenario. This is how we have chosen to live.

ME. MYSELF. MY FAMILY.
As long as the above mentioned have a decent life with good nutritional food and comforts, life is good right?
How does it matter if a farmer commits suicide? Rest in peace is all we can utter.
We need to get out of this immediate surrounding. For we all are interdependent on each other. A little bird in the threat to extinction is a threat to humans as well. Then why do we take the lives of others as worthless? A lion capturing its prey makes you pray for a tiny little second that the prey should escape. But when you aren't voting and ignoble to the well being of the country and in turn it's people, which includes you, yourself and your family too, you are no less than that lion. Selfish, stone-hearted, fierce and narrow minded.

Please exercise your right to vote. It does make a difference. Just remember, someone, somewhere is surviving because of  your one decision that you were so inconsiderate about.

A Mirage of Perfection.

A movie is just a like a mirage. Showering a ray of hope when it is much needed and shattering the same when you get closer to it. It is often said that movies are a potrayal of what happens in life. Well, how true is that? 

It is as true as the fact that the south and the north pole just lie next to each other or that summer and winter co-exist or a baby is adroit in all the languages in the world the moment it is born. That much true. No, not frustrated again. 

Just hopefully hopeless. Funnily tragic. And, enthusiastically tired. 

A Movie is just not a movie. It is a series of moments wherein  everything can happen. Where miracles are as simple as a lichen growing on a moist surface. Not at all a wonder. Even more so, expect-able. 

A dying cancer patient is the most beautiful women you ever came across with long curls, perfect skin, as enthusiastic and cheerful as an early spring blossom. 

The kid who has the most terrific aunt, who has lost all his family and loved ones turns out to be the President of the country. One song, just one song, hardly 5 minutes. Or let's make it sound a little grandeur. Just a matter of 300 seconds. Viola! The poor, hardworking soul transforms into an overly handsome and rich and successful eligible bachelor. A villa is built and renovated and destroyed down in seconds.

A wedding gets called off just one hour before the scheduled time.

A family who has always misunderstood finally attains enlightenment and all things fall into place.

Lovers from past life meet and re-unite.A knife stabbed into the inter-ventricular wall of the heart is just fine. The hero is going to survive anyway. A bomb-blast kills everyone but  leaves the hero only with a eeny-meany-tiny scratch on the forehead.

Shooting stars fall down at the rate of 24354356 cm per milli second so that you can say a dialogue and rewind about something/somebody and then after all the flash back, finally make a wish, when the star has just moved an inch. A beam of light falls on you and you are the chosen one. The most blessed of all. 

People actually realize and apologize when they hurt you and in the climax all seems to make perfect sense.

It goes on and on.

Probably by now, you have come up with your own conditions to crib about, didn't you? Congrats. Happens.

Maybe the movies aren't what we experience. Maybe it is just what we would like to experience.

Wanting something and getting the same are two different worlds. Oh yes, and where a parallel universe exists. Where aliens understand your mother tongue. 

Where, where, where, you, you, you, something, something, something...

But it's never too late to hope isn't it? One thing that movies have taught me, Hopeless hope. Really, depressingly, not funny.

 Sometimes, nothing makes sense. But alas, not making sense at all is as wonderful as a late winter's moon than non-sense like questions asked in examinations. (A bird is flying 100 feet above the ground. A child was crying. What is the mass of the particle on the moon which is traveling at the speed of 45 km per second?)

Sigh. I will let you know once my trip to Jupiter is over. 

The Mid-Summer Rain. Touchwood.

Right from the time I have been in my senses, I always disliked summers barring the Summer break back in school. On the other hand, Monsoon was such a darling. Blame it on the relationship between Bangalore & Rains or between Bangaloreans and Rains, the happiness never seems to die down.
Bangalore officially had its first pre monsoon shower. A bliss. A blessing. A much needed gift after being roasted by the summer as steamy as a terrarium.

The heat finally gave way to the rain. Soggy clouds, soft and innocent fill up the sky with heavy rain that was yet to befall. The smell of things both living and non-living mixed in the air. The clouds swirled upon like gauzy curtains to exhibit something that was long held within. Day light sank deeper and deeper into the darkness. This was a sign. The blazing heat of the afternoon was replaced by the shimmer of the silver-black clouds for it seemed to split so loud. Every little living being spilled out of its immediate surrounding to capture the glimpse of what was going to be next.

Touched by such immense respect & wonder, the haughty clouds learnt their lesson. The haughtiness washed away. The spectacular rains shooting right through the atmosphere of the earth. The first drop raced against the others and plunged into the arms of a little child who went ecstatic over that first touch. The sound of thunder muzzled every bit of noise. This sound was beautiful. Hence followed the lightning. Tearing apart the sky and lighting it up in shades of purple and haze and all that the human eye could afford to notice. The rain poured in torrents.The smell of mud flavored by the lashing drops of water was vivid.   The children played with overwhelming happiness..

The scent of spices accelerated the hunger. Mother(s), I say.      

They know what's best pertaining to which time. And here comes my darling. COFFEE. The strong scent of it was if I was inhaling it rather than drinking it. The trees and shrubs danced in spectacular wonder, for they longed for this moment. It's a beautiful evening. Now I know what the hassle about summer is. If not for summer, these rains would have meant ordinary. Life is amazing. All we have to do is just look at it & embrace it.

 

BYE CHEWING GUM.

Well, no. Not the edible chewing gum. A deep metaphor. A really, really, really DEEP one. The characteristics of a chewing gum wonderfully coincide with that of memories.
Memories, memories, everywhere. This moment, the reason behind why I'm writing this too goes back to the cascade of memories. A memory I thought would be a pleasant one. But no, it's always the opposite of what you think/judge/interpret right?
A memory that keeps coming back like a swing. Yeah, am running short of metaphors to describe it. So, let's get back. Memory. Swing. You push a swing up in the air, hoping it to race against the wind and go far away, as much as it possibly could. Initially, it goes. Way beyond and you're happy. You smile. You feel accomplished. And then, the climax. Your blurred focus on the swing starts clearing out. Ultra-high-focus on the swing. There it swings back to you. With a larger magnitude. Higher velocity and sadly intensified.
NO. This was not supposed to come back. But it did. Acceptance. Here comes acceptance into the limelight. With a mean grin, as if it were saying, 'I told you, you couldn't push it away'. Then comes your ever wonderful mind which fights back, which says, 'No, I'm fine'. Followed by a series of YES(s) and NO(s).

This memory.., wait, I don't want to sound like a depressed-old movie heroine-diagnosed-with-cancer. So, let's replace memory with chewing gum. This chewing gum seems to haunt you everywhere. It gets under your shoes, you can't walk. It sticks to your beautiful hair and ruins all of it. You pick it up and hurl it into a bin wanting to get rid of it. But it sticks to your hand. Now what?

Breathe. Sigh. It's alright. It's alright to be messed up and angry. After all, we aren't a fungus growing on  a pond scum right? Spare me. I'm just completely in love with this phrase from the Rom-com "My Bestfriend's Wedding''. I enjoy using it everywhere.

What to do with this god damn chewing gum? Replace it with a chocolate? But then, the chewing gum was all you wanted at one point of time. Isn't it bad to replace it? Why does it bother still? Did the chewing gum think of you? About how it hurt?  NO.
 Maybe, no, stay on the page. Not the big Maybe post again. Just generally maybe.
 Maybe it is because we only want to see what we want and not what is meant to be. Maybe this is for the best. To accept and let go. To come across the chewing gum one fine(not-so-fine) day, and not to bother at all. To just enjoy the sweet chocolate. The sweet, tasty, attractive, wonderful, every good adjective-ly amazing chocolate. The chocolate. The PRESENT. That is a gift to you. A gift many would like to have but don't. Savor it while it lasts. Make it a wonderful chewing gum that you would like to receive again and again and not swing away.
SMILE. :)

The something-something mall vs the age-old vendor custom.

A common scene that we all grew up watching was the vendors with their carts selling fruits, vegetables to little toys & cotton candy that children awaited with complete happiness. The ting-ting of the bells that the cotton candy man carried gave a happiness that could be analogized with the turning of the signal light from red to green when you're rushing to catch your favorite movie. 
All the ladies of the street enquiring about the well being of the lady who sold vegetables, about the rising prices, quick talks about how government is so irresponsible & all bits of too-important-to-miss-out-on-topics.

This reminds me of the Hindi lessons learnt back in school. खिलौनेवाला , मिटाईवा ,गुबारेवाला (Toy seller, sweet/chocolate seller & balloon seller respectively). Missing out on these people meant a huge sin that any kid could dare to commit. Yellow, orange, blue, white, all kinds of balloons, chocolates & very popular 'Made in China' toys that eventually were broken into pieces  in India by little going-to-be engineers. Yes, we grew up with the popularizing title of Engineers and Doctors and looked upon them as idols. Well, things have changed. Some for the good and some for the contrary.    

Life was simpler. Simpler than the most simplest thing we have today. Neighbors meant family, weekends meant gossiping about what happened in the next street, who passed with flying colors, who got married and who didn't. And while we were directing our ears to these gossips, we would get hushed away by mom & the other aunty's back to our play. Play time had a lot of variations. Hide & seek, goli, gilli, hop-scotch, jump rope ( I called it skipping), kite making & flying. Remember those times? It's always good to go back to the good ones and smile. 

Alright. Done. Back to the present.
Any idea what is your neighbor's name? How are they? Some of you would proudly say a YES, and few others would probably be cursing me for reminding of your neighbor who set a password for his/her wi-fi. Can relate better huh? I get it.

Buying vegetables & fruits from the vendors isn't cool anymore.The malls. That's the ultimate destination.
Need a perfume? The something-something multi-storeyed mall to the rescue. Groceries? Again, the mall. Toys? Let's make a trip to the mall, because now the little engineers want to break 'Made in China' products purchased only from the something mall. Standard. Reputation.Class. Whatever it seems to be.
 Now, the vendors seem to appear like pathogens. Unhygienic, poor quality, high cost. Yes, this is what they provide. The only means of survival for the vendors comes to a stand still. The vegetables stored in freezers, that completely stops all metabolic processes and is made inactive is the new FRESH vegetables. Purchasing the frozen items is absolutely okay with us but not the ones that these vendors carry from the market till your doorstep everyday. Fair enough right? Frozen is better, for it comes packed in labelled packets with the so & so brand names.  A rupee extra to the vendor would infuriate us, but thousands of rupees paid to the something-something mall seems all just & fair because they gave you an offer of 5% on a random product you didn't need at all in the first place. A rupee extra to the vendor's pocket that would eventually be a chocolate for his kid is a huge loss to us than the money spent at the mall that would be an added luxury to a person who is probably on his world tour. How sweet of us to contribute this way. In fact, we deserve a huge pat on our back. Well done.

 The world is shrinking they say. But shrinking to a vast distance. A huge void in the making. We have chosen to let it happen. It's cool. It's class. It's modern life as some might call it. 
I'm glad I had a childhood of the former. The stories of our childhood are too vague to imagine for the future generations. Just like the theories of dinosaurs and their extinguished existence. Just in a combination of 26 alphabets is where they exist.

Advertising gone wild???

There was a time when advertising meant a method for creating awareness among the general public about the available resources and opportunities. Trust me, that time is gone. Just gone.

The present scenario is just too infuriating!
Shampoo, toothpaste, hair oil, cookies, dresses, websites, more so even educational institutions are fast competing with one another in the race of endorsement and advertising to exhibit their product to be the best.

Just grab a copy of Times Classifieds and you would agree with me.
Property, accepted. Job vacancies, accepted. Admissions, accepted.
Match-making? A big, bold, underlined, highlighted, NO.

A fair, good looking, handsome/beautiful, intelligent, kind hearted, sensitive, understanding, highly qualified & paid, US/UK/Europe/Australia/anywhere outside India (just for the sake of a NRI achievement),something-something-something-something, something caste, something-something, only son/daughter to their parents, something-something. The list just goes on and on and on. 

Like seriously? Is this how you define a person? Is this how we find a person? 
Reading these posts is a better entertainment than any given reality show. All the adjectives are given as constraints & expected to be found. How worse can it get? 

Well, it certainly can. As if all these ad(s) were less embarrassing & shameful that people come up with websites for the same purpose. 
God knows where this is heading to. Maybe this is a destination without a path. A highly stupid & senseless approach.

Every other coaching center becomes Bangalore's number 1, India's number 1!!
Why is there a need to exaggerate so much? Notice it or not, the value of every potent aspect is deteriorating day by day at an alarming rate. We do notice but just brush it off aside from our mind. This is how most things work right? 

Angered, upset and sadly humored by what is THE PRESENT.